Thursday, November 30, 2017

In search of fulfillment

Ted. My last working day was exactly one year ago, 11/30/16. Last night, Judy and I returned to “the scene of the crime” as the current owners of the business that I helped found in 1996 invited us back for the company's annual Christmas party. It was a lot of fun and we heard stories of the busy, happy and rewarding year that they have enjoyed in my absence, which did my heart good. The company, owners and employees are flourishing.

By contrast, though, many friends and family members that we are visiting with now, appear to be suffering, and not flourishing. They are either stuck in jobs that they don't like or, having retired, are trapped in frustrating volunteer commitments.

Today, I read an article at Forbes.com by John Coleman entitled “The Crucial Thing Missing From the Work-Life Balance Debate.” It caused me to reflect on the choices that I am making as well as those of others I have been speaking with recently. Here’s a link if you want to read it yourself:


Mr. Coleman challenges us to examine where we spend our time, both at home and at work and categorize each activity using the following matrix:



Many people who know and love us tell us how happy they are that we are "living our dream." What they actually seeing, though is two people that are trying to focus more time on activities that are both purposeful and joyful. Our lives are not perfect but our goal is to truly flourish. My hope is that some of our friends and family will make progress in 2018 along their own paths to fulfillment. 

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Establishing community

Judy. It is definitely good to be back with family and friends. Our calendar is filling up quickly with lunch, dinner, coffee, house sitting, and houseguest dates, all of which we’re enjoying immensely. Spending time with our three grandsons is an extra treat.

But we left behind a community in Oaxaca that made it a little more difficult to leave than it has been in other cities, so I want to give a virtual hug to the folks we left behind:

Our fellow teachers through En Via—Kendall and Leila, the new education coordinators; Rubyat, the special ed teacher from San Diego who is spending his sabbatical working with the kids in the Pueblos; Julia, just out of college and trying to figure out what’s next (and a fine teacher), Hanna, traveling south of the border in part because it’s cheaper to live, and looking for volunteer opportunities wherever. Hanna, an artist who’s learning beading techniques so she can still create and travel, became a good shopping and exploring buddy, and I miss her.
Tlocochahya teachers
On Wednesdays after classes, we all stopped by the Park El Llano for the “best esquites in Oaxaca”, and on Fridays met for “tacos at two” at the tianguis, the traveling market. 

Kitty and Francesca, our “next door neighbors” in the Airbnb—sisters, one living in Florida and the other in the Yucatan, who meet in various areas of Mexico each year. They spend some time sightseeing, but mostly catching up with each other.
Kitty, Francesca, and Catrina
We spent evenings on the rooftop patio drinking wine and sharing food and sightseeing recommendations.


Tonio, my yoga teacher at Prana Yoga--I was often his only student, so the class was tailored to me. He pushed me to go as far as I could, as long as I respected what my body could do. He also told me that because of my age, "the student has become the teacher." Having a class in Spanish really helped me improve mine!  
Tonio

Javier, who owned and operated Nanixhe, a tiny restaurant (two tables inside, two outside)—he cooked, bartended, cleaned, and still found time to sit with us and drink mezcal while we munched on his incredible tapas. He shared his dreams with us on many an evening.
Javier at work

The kids we taught—funny, frustrating, smart, and not so smart.

Maria, who owned the B & B where we first stayed (and experienced our first earthquake)—we said we only wanted coffee and bread at breakfast, but she wormed her way into our hearts and stomachs with the dishes she “just happened to be cooking”.
Maria
She also gave us our first introduction to the city and encouraged our Spanish.

The folks we met at the intercambio conversations (one hour in Spanish and one hour in English) on Saturday mornings at the Oaxaca Lending Library, especially the guy who, after I had apologized again for my lousy Spanish told me, “Hey, you’re communicating. You’re fine!” He’ll never know how much encouragement that gave me.

The tiny congregation at Holy Trinity Episcopal Church, and the coffee hour after the service. We got a lot of information from those folks. We seemed to run into Kathi (lives in Oaxaca, has a car in Boulder) all over town--she shares our travel dreams.

William and Nora, the hosts of our Airbnb. William gave us countless suggestions for restaurants and street food, and often invited Ted to go with him to run errands. Nora gave me a great lesson on the different types of clothing available, where they were made and what to look for.

Oh, and the folks at Oaxaca in a Cup, whose names I never learned, but, who, when they saw me coming, said, “Si—chocolate caliente con agua!” before I could place my order for hot chocolate. I guess I went there a lot.


There were others—Alfredo the gatekeeper at En Via, Arturo at the coffeeshop, the little girls at a Days of the Dead celebration who ran up to practice their English, and, oh, so many more--but these people made our stay—our life in Oaxaca—a real life, and not just a visit. Whether or not we see them again, they have become a part of our journey.
Hanna, Julia, and Kristin at the Tlocolula Sunday Market
Ted and Rubyat at Xocimilco
Little Catrinas at Xocimilco



Thursday, November 16, 2017

Short-term apartment rentals

Ted. We have returned to Atlanta and are settled into the little apartment that we have rented for five weeks.  We find that apartments or cottages are much better than hotels for stays of a week or more and are usually cheaper so we have been renting them for many years. There are numerous websites such as VRBO and HomeAway but we usually start with Airbnb as they seem to have the most listings. Yes, we understand that Airbnb is causing mayhem in the housing markets in many cities but, for travelers such as ourselves, the benefits are overwhelming.

We have learned several lessons in evaluating apartments over the years. There are a few important “must haves.” First, we insist on what Airbnb calls an “Entire Home” with separate entrance as we are not interested in just a room in someone’s house. The unit should have a queen size bed and wifi. We also prefer a one-bedroom apartment to a studio. This means that there is a door to the bedroom that can be closed so that I don’t wake Judy when I get up early to make coffee. We typically eat breakfast and one other meal at home each day so we look for a full kitchen rather than just a microwave and mini-fridge. Amenities that are nice but not essential include air conditioning (in warm climates), cable/Netflix, clothes washer/dryer and a dishwasher. We agree with Lynne Martin, author of Home Sweet Anywhere that it is rare to find a unit with a decent sofa and set of knives so we are simply thankful if we get those. Lastly, we need a good night’s sleep.  It is hard to gage how quiet an apartment will be but a lot of info can be gleaned from comments and the description. Is it a basement or multistory apartment with folks clomping around upstairs? Is it above a café or on a busy street? Is it a "mother-in-law suite" attached to the owner's home?

The photos on the listing can offer up some clues as to how comfortable the unit will be. Are there nice pictures on the walls or is it sparsely decorated? Are there lots of windows or is it dark? Any ceiling fans? Are there several seating options (indoors or outside) or just a couple of chairs? I look for a unit with at least 10 to 20 reviews and read each one, looking for subtle tips such as “it’s hard to sleep on weekends” or “we loved walking in the peaceful park across the street.” We can’t get the exact address of the apartment in the listing but the general location is shown and that helps me to narrow it down to a neighborhood which I then explore using “Street View” in google maps. Is it a busy street or in a rough looking neighborhood? Is there a grocery in walking distance? What about public transportation? 

We have never had a bad apartment but the experience has varied from acceptable to really great. One lesson we have learned is to communicate with our landlord promptly if a small problem arises so that they have an opportunity to address it. In the end, one of the best parts of renting an apartment or cottage is that we stay in residential neighborhoods, not hotel districts so we immediately begin to feel like locals as soon as we walk out the door. And in a way, we are locals - if only for five weeks!

Sunday, November 12, 2017

Quote du Jour

Traveler’s Prayer

Bless me, Lord, as I begin this adventure.
Open my eyes to see you in the people I will meet.
Open my ears to hear your word in new
      and surprising ways.
Open my hands to be your blessing
      in whatever situation I find myself.
And open my heart to receive you wherever I may go.
Protect me from harm as I travel
and give your wisdom to those I rely on for my safety.
When my travel is ended and my journey complete,
bring me home again, renewed by your love.
Amen
 

Diana Macalintal